Front Row at Paris Fashion Week

It’s time for a quick trip to Paris, dear readers. You deserve it!

LEELEE SOBIESKI at the Dior show in Paris
dress, belt, and shoes by Christian Dior

Photo: Joseph Kerlakian/Rex

Bow. The. Fuck. DOWN. Leelee is killing it in the most delicious red coat dress I’ve ever laid eyes on. Love the pockets, belt, and the perfect gray shoes. Everything about this is fabulous.

AMANDA SEYFRIED at the Miu Miu show
suit by Miu Miu, purse and shoes by Prada

Photo: Getty

The upcoming Les Mis movie means that Amanda Seyfried, like Anne Hathaway, will be all over the red carpet, and she’s started with a fantastic appearance in Paris. If she’s going to pull out more fucking delectable Miu Miu suits and absolutely killer Prada accessories, I am going to be the happiest diva in the blogosphere.

EMMA STONE at the Miu Miu show
dress and purse by Miu Miu

Photo: INFphoto.com

A perfect LBD, and she looks very American-girl-in-Paris with her black cardigan (though I’d have preferred a blazer). The purse is chic, the matching shoes are adorable, but the matching lipstick might be a touch over the top. And this feels so 2010, but I have to complain about that blonde hair. It’s just not the right shade for her.

OLIVIA PALERMO at the Dior show
jacket, dress, and purse by Christian Dior, shoes by Giuseppe Zanotti

Photo: Pascal Le Segretain/Getty

That’s a lot of leather and pleats – probably more than any human being should wear together. But Olivia somehow pulls it off with simple, chic pumps and a furry purse. (Furse? Is that be a thing? Should I be making “furse” happen?)

CHLOË SEVIGNY at the Miu Miu show
jacket, top, shorts, purse, and shoes by Miu Miu

Photo: tomandlorenzo.com

No one else on earth could pull it off, but I can’t pretend I don’t love literally every single part of this outfit. And I usually don’t have patience for Chloë’s fashion antics, but with a chic haircut and her legs looking amazing in those shorts, I have no cause for complaint.

TAYLOR SWIFT at the Elie Saab show
dress and purse by Elie Saab

Photo: Dominique Charriau/WireImage

I love this dress. It’s ridiculously flattering, adorable but not twee, incredibly well-fit, and the color is perfect. I’d never have gone with a blue clutch and the taupe shoes are only okay, but T. Swift is looking sweet but chic.

KRISTEN STEWART at the Balenciaga show
jacket, pants, and boots by Balenciaga

Photo: Joseph Kerlakian/Rex

I hate her hair and boots too much to enjoy this outfit, which is a shame. I love Kristen in pants, and these are great ones, and that pale yellow motorcycle jacket is a killer piece. But it’s Paris Fashion Week, Kristen. Brush your god damn hair.

DIANNA AGRON at the Miu Miu show
dress and shoes by Miu Miu

Photo: Bertrand Rindoff Petroff/Getty

I dig the Barbra-meets-Twiggy hair and makeup (duh), and I think the dress/stockings combo is delicious and fun. The blue suede platform sandals, however, were an obvious mistake. Open-toed shoes with stockings, Dianna? Did you really think you could get away with it?

BÉRÉNICE BEJO at the Louis Vuitton show
dress and jacket by Louis Vuitton, shoes by Christian Louboutin

Photo: Francois Durand/Getty

The jacket and dress are beautiful, but together, it’s a bit much. Perhaps the leopard print trim on the dress is what’s pushing it over the top for me. That and the green purse. And she should have gone subtle with the shoes, but if I have to complain about how boring nude peep-toe pumps are one more time, I’ll lose my mind.

LEIGH LEZARK at the Chanel show
top and skirt by Chanel

Photo: PA

I really can’t support a denim vest, even if it is by Chanel. But in spite of that, there are things I like here, namely her purse, shoes, and nothing else.

SALMA HAYEK at the McQueen show

Photo: Nicolas Briquet/Abaca

A little matronly – I wish she hadn’t closed the coat so tightly and covered it with that massive necklace – but the dress is clearly beautiful. I just wish we could see more of it. The shoes work, but the giant purse is just another distraction.

SALMA HAYEK at the Stella McCartney show
dress and jacket by Stella McCartney

Photo: Bertrand Rindoff Petroff/Getty

I love the cut and color of that blazer – it looks custom-made for her, which it should, because it most likely is. But I can’t take a grown woman wearing a butterfly pin seriously,  so I refuse to comment any further.

SALMA HAYEK at the Saint Laurent show
top, skirt, purse, and shoes by Yves Saint Laurent

Photo: Dominique Charriau/WireImage

I don’t know what I hate most – the pussy bow or the sheer fabric at the top. It’s mediocre Project Runway work at best, the hair is tacky, and the accessories are downright boring.

JESSICA CHASTAIN at the Saint Laurent show
dress and shoes by Yves Saint Laurent

Photo: FameFlynet

Jessica, can you please try a little harder? Your lackadaisical approach to a Paris runway show is highly disappointing. And whoever told you orange-red lips and matching nails would work on you is a filthy liar.

JENNIFER LOPEZ at the Chanel show
dress and purse by Chanel, shoes by Tom Ford

Photo: Joseph Kerlakian/Rex

You’re a grown-ass woman, Jennifer Lopez. Enough with the freaking babydoll dresses. Also: your shoes have tassels on them. I see absolutely no reason for that nonsense.


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